whitefox: (Kurama172)
𝐊𝐔𝐑𝐀𝐌𝐀 🌹 𝐘𝐔 𝐘𝐔 𝐇𝐀𝐊𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐎 ([personal profile] whitefox) wrote in [community profile] applenet 2017-09-18 03:48 pm (UTC)

Kurama ☸ Eligor

Yes, I did.

[Hence why he's one of the only ones (so far, at least) who isn't really complaining. He asked for this. He literally asked for it. It's too late now to take that back.

He's not even sure he would if he could. It's proving to be just as illuminating about everyone else.

Everyone not already Awakened, at least...]


It isn't quite the same, there is no freedom in the ways which we can answer these questions, none but the last. Why do I think the future is unavoidable? Why do I consider myself a bad person? Why did I kill someone? Why is my only response to enjoying it that it's just complicated?

We're left with more questions than answers and only guesses to fill in those blanks.


[The first time the app contacted him, it asked whether or not he would kill a man or woman. Kit answered yes, for self-defense. Was that why he did kill someone?

If so, he can see how that might be 'complicated.' Satisfaction would be an inevitable part of safety, but perhaps he took no real pleasure in the act itself. In other words, he enjoyed the benefits, but not the process. Or at least...that's a theory. And he has no such thing for the other questions. Is he bad for killing someone, or perhaps for something else? He recalls the brief flashes of memories he's had up to this point. The only truly terrible thing he can recall having done was sentencing to death a companion who had become a liability.

Perhaps it's just complicated truly is the best answer of them all.]

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