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COUNTDOWN: THE SMALL VOICE THAT RINGS OUT
Seven days remain. Or so it would seem. Somehow you might not still be convinced. This is all just a strange coincidence, but to go as far as to claim that you have other memories... can it?
But things have already been set alight inside the hearts of those chosen few who have received the app on their phones. For some, it's just the first bite of the apple. For others, it's been like shaking down an entire tree. Things are beginning to look... strange. Surely there are more burning questions on their minds by now.
The warning bells of the Nightly Curfew ring across the city. There's a faint hum from the phone this time before the icon appears. This time it displays a time: 1:00AM
The rest of the night is normal. Perhaps you've cuddled up with family, or you've gone to bed early to wait, but sure enough, time tick by right until 1 in the morning when...
You're back into that application again. A single question before you're even permitted to type anything else. And while it seems to be overwritten by something inside of you, it feels a lot more natural than before. Which is, truthfully... troubling.
And yet, a tiny little font at the bottom. A bit hard to miss but if you hover your finger over it will answer for you...
No. Not yet...
Once you are done, you are tossed once more into the main chatroom. Now your user names are the names that you wrote down in the last survey, but with all those questions it's... hard not to think of them as your own. Maybe you'll be cursing at this device, but it looks like you're already deep down the rabbit hole by now.
[OOC: This is the final network post before Awakening. Users will now be able to speak of who they are in their AU life without the information being blocked by the application.
As a note! Characters who select "no" will not need to Awaken next week and will be able to delay to later. Instead, the character will be able to proceed with logs as a Pre-Awakened, be aware of certain issues happening in the city, however their memories will not be complete and they will be unable to fight back (apart from their own weapons). Note that they will be unable to use a Persona until they fully Awaken. There will be more details to follow, if you pick this option.
As always, while they will not get any new on their own, speaking with Luci might grant the Awakened more memories... be careful that they don't get more than they bargained for.]
But things have already been set alight inside the hearts of those chosen few who have received the app on their phones. For some, it's just the first bite of the apple. For others, it's been like shaking down an entire tree. Things are beginning to look... strange. Surely there are more burning questions on their minds by now.
The warning bells of the Nightly Curfew ring across the city. There's a faint hum from the phone this time before the icon appears. This time it displays a time: 1:00AM
The rest of the night is normal. Perhaps you've cuddled up with family, or you've gone to bed early to wait, but sure enough, time tick by right until 1 in the morning when...
You're back into that application again. A single question before you're even permitted to type anything else. And while it seems to be overwritten by something inside of you, it feels a lot more natural than before. Which is, truthfully... troubling.
WELCOME TO THE FINAL QUIZ!
Answer from the heart, the part of you that has been denied for far too long.
Do you want to remember?
Yes | Hell Yes| Definitely | Of course I do!
Answer from the heart, the part of you that has been denied for far too long.
Do you want to remember?
Yes | Hell Yes| Definitely | Of course I do!
And yet, a tiny little font at the bottom. A bit hard to miss but if you hover your finger over it will answer for you...
Once you are done, you are tossed once more into the main chatroom. Now your user names are the names that you wrote down in the last survey, but with all those questions it's... hard not to think of them as your own. Maybe you'll be cursing at this device, but it looks like you're already deep down the rabbit hole by now.
[OOC: This is the final network post before Awakening. Users will now be able to speak of who they are in their AU life without the information being blocked by the application.
As a note! Characters who select "no" will not need to Awaken next week and will be able to delay to later. Instead, the character will be able to proceed with logs as a Pre-Awakened, be aware of certain issues happening in the city, however their memories will not be complete and they will be unable to fight back (apart from their own weapons). Note that they will be unable to use a Persona until they fully Awaken. There will be more details to follow, if you pick this option.
As always, while they will not get any new on their own, speaking with Luci might grant the Awakened more memories... be careful that they don't get more than they bargained for.]
WHY NOT
The mention of pancakes did not go unheard.
As he gently nursed his sore ribs, he made his way to the cupboards and fridge pulling out all the ingredients he would need for three different varieties: strawberry, blueberry, and chocolate-cinnamon. The first two would be simple, the same base batter being used for both with different fruits added while cooking, but the chocolate batter would be much more rich. Its aroma would also prove the most exquisite, its heady sweetness stalking relentlessly through the dorm for hungry victims to tantalize. Even Kurama, with his delicate appetite, found the sweet smell tempting beyond measure.
After several minutes of cooking and a few extra spent cleaning up, he finally emitted a small, satisfied sigh tinged with a hint of humor.]
It's ready, but I think I may have made too much...
[He knew very well he hadn't made too much, but only because he knew whom he was preparing breakfast for. Anyone else would only eat half of what he'd prepared, or perhaps even only a quarter, but Vincent was voracious. Even Kit had found it endearing after a time, and Kurama was no different. A healthy appetite was an important thing to have, serving to strengthen the mind and body. And since he would be Awakening himself in a week...
Vincent needed this.
As he set the table, placing three different plates of stacked pancakes on it to choose from, including various toppings from maple syrup or whipped cream to butter or chocolate syrup, he tried not to think about how this might be the last meal he made for them.
The clock was ticking...but he didn't even know how much time was left.]
Help yourself to as much as you like.
BECAUSE WE CAN BARELY REMEMBER OUR OWN NAMES
Did you really expect anything else whether you let me or not?
[the words are just as sharp as the rest of them have been this morning, but there's a wry expression on Vincent's face as he settles artlessly into his seat that absorbs more of the shock. he really was starving.
without any further ado he slowly sets to work building a frightening tower of pancakes on his plate, heavily favoring the chocolate ones. he pauses intermittently to top some of them with the various options available before continuing to openly defy god with the hubris of man.]
THAT WAS ONE TIME
[Taking a seat opposite Vincent, Kurama pulled a couple of the strawberry pancakes onto his own plate. He helped himself to a little of the whipped cream too, but nothing else. The variety was meant entirely for his companion, as Vincent had suspected. Between them, the smaller boy's appetite was greater, and whether or not he bothered to exercise his manners, Kurama knew that Vincent was grateful for what had been put before him.
He didn't need to say thank you. It was enough that he was eating and not wasting anything. And that was the way it had always been between them. Even...when Vincent was whom he was meant to be.]
To be perfectly honest, however...
[Kurama cut a piece of pancake free and dipped it into the whipped cream before holding it up on his fork.]
...I did expect that by giving you my permission you would inevitably bristle like a grumpy cat. And I was right.
WE'VE FORGOTTEN THINGS WAY MORE THAN ONCE
as he swallows prematurely, his sullen gaze remains on the pancake bit being waved mockingly in front of his face. they've played this game enough for him to know it was meant as a challenge, but given the previous outcomes he isn't sure if indulging his temper is worth the risk.]
You're up your own ass again. It's just annoying for you to keep pretending as if you have any say in things.
[...ah, fuck it. he reaches out to quickly try and bat the fork (and its load) onto the ground.]
I REJECT YOUR OBVIOUS FALSIFICATION OF THE TRUTH.
[With a hint of mischief playing at the corners of his lips, Kurama not only tugged the fork and its impaled piece of pancake out of Vincent's reach, but transferred the bite-sized morsel straight into his own mouth. The summery sweet freshness of the strawberries danced on his tongue, lending an intolerable curve to his already wry smile.
That too was a bad habit, and one it seemed he wasn't in any hurry to correct.]
You'll need to be quicker than that next time.
you'll forget it later anyway, don't get so worked up
he's better at judging this sort of thing now and knows it's too late to try and retrieve his original target. for a moment, however, it seems as if he's decided to make the attempt in the face of common sense; stupid as it was, it was certainly a very him thing to do. he leans forward on that failed hand to reach out and grab Kit by the cheeks, squeezing his hands gently to squish his lips and (presumably) force him to spit the food out.
there's a speculative sort of quality to his expression now alongside the irritation. as he gives another little squeeze he can't help but chuckle as he asks quietly:]
Who said I wasn't?
[and just like that he drops back into his seat again, having achieved the real goal: his 'supporting' hand had latched onto Kit's plate of remaining pancakes and dragged it back over to his side of the table.
there's no reason for him to do that with how many he already has. but Vincent grins all the same, immediately tucking into the purloined breakfast ahead of his own. delicious.]
Forget what?
That was one question among many that Kurama asked himself as Vincent leaned across the small dinette table and grabbed his cheek with one hand, fingers pinching until his lips puckered involuntarily. Things had recently become more complicated between them. Or, more accurately, between his other self and Vincent. Moments like these were often so intense or amorously charged that Kurama was left to wonder what Kit would have done in the same situation.
And while he wondered, his plate was snatched out from under him.
...he couldn't even be mad at the clever ploy, not when he'd fallen into the trap on his own. But now that he was without a plate, he also had no pancakes to eat. Excepting the stacks left between them, that was.
Plucking one of the blueberry pancakes off a plate, he sat back in his chair to pull loose a small piece that he promptly plopped into his mouth. It wasn't victory, but it wasn't defeat, either. And it still tasted sweet.]
Don't complain when you eat so much your stomach hurts.
exactly
for now, at least.]
Why would I? You'll clean up either way.
[was he a romantic interest or a more advanced form of a roomba? sometimes it really was hard for Vincent to differentiate between the two options.]
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Unfortunately, it wouldn't be long now before that privilege was lost. How would it happen, he wondered? Cleaning up after breakfast would leave Vincent with plenty of time to himself, some of which would probably be spent checking the app to see if there were any new developments, something that had become a habit for them both the closer to Awakening they had gotten.
And once he checked he would see...a post that Kit had been foolish in making, his unrivaled impatience and impulsiveness (something he and Kurama didn't have in common) leading him to do something that had been completely unnecessary and reckless.
Oh, he understood the reasons why, how could he not? Kit Florentine was still a part of him. But there was no denying what a fool his other self could be at times. And the impending disaster it would soon leave him to deal with.
As he slowly ate in contemplative silence, now and then stealing glances in Vincent's direction, Kurama decided that he would accept whatever the other boy decided to do when he found out. Whether it was to strike him or to leave or tell him to leave or something else. He owed him that.]
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The hell is it now?
[Kit wasn't someone who did anything without purpose. he wasn't just staring at him because the view was admirable. maybe he was still sour about having been cockblocked last night.]
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I was just wondering if you even needed to breathe while eating.
[With a chuckle, he finished off the last of his pancake before getting up from the table to go wash his hands at the sink. With his back to the other boy it was easier to hide the worry that had gripped his heart like some kind of steel trap. And, when he spoke again, his voice was content and peaceful, betraying none of what lurked beneath his placid surface...]
If you're still hungry I could make something else.
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unfortunately he was also just a little bit more prone to allowing his bad temper to cause him to fall for easy distractions. both comments cause him to exhale loudly and with a great amount of disdain, even as he begins polishing off his last few pancakes.]
It's not going up my nose.
[what idiot needed to slow down to continue breathing while they ate? that was so stupid.]
And this is fine. There're still things in the fridge for later.
[for the inevitable later when he grew hungry again and laid waste to the poor food receptacle. no amount of pancakes would ever prevent Kit from having to make grocery runs nearly every day.]
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His smile remained in place as he returned to the table to begin putting things away, and it hid well the troubled thoughts weighing on his mind, or so he believed. He was still newly Awakened and he hadn't slept. And now on top of it all he was worried about a 'later' that might never come. How successful his attempts at maintaining his mask were was truly hard to say.
Until now, Kurama had never worried about whether Vincent would stay and eat all the food in his fridge. He'd simply learned to accept that he would, that it was the unavoidable reality of their relationship...and that was fine with him. Only, once Vincent learned the truth, that reality would change. And Kurama realized he would miss that quarrelsome element in his life and having someone to dote upon. He was dreading that zero hour because, for once, he wasn't really sure how to handle the problem.
He was cool-headed and calculating, capable of shutting of his emotions, but this situation required a level of finesse he simply didn't have when it came to other peoples' feelings. Probably, he should tell Vincent himself. Before he had the chance to find out any other way.
He could do that at least...right?]
Vincent...
[In his contemplating, Kurama cleared most the table off and had returned the toppings to the fridge. Only then did he close the door and turn to give his companion his full attention.]
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Vincent's hand falls away from where it had been wiping stray whipped cream from the corner of his mouth, expression settling into something decidedly more serious. his own mind had already been moving through the rest of his schedule, deciding on a shower soon and reminding himself the band had practice today. to say he was surprised would be a bit extreme, but Kit's tone certainly caught him off guard for a moment or two.]
What?
[a part of him still wonders if he won't be hearing the riot act over his pushy actions last night? it's what informs his posture even as his eyes focus completely on his companion; he's so obviously unrepentant sitting in that chair, so ready to spark a fight in order to defend his choices.]
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Obviously, his other self hadn't thought that part through. He'd been selfish in his hurry to find out the truth, doggedly pursuing his memories at all cost. In hindsight, Kurama thought he'd been a complete fool...and the one to pay the price wasn't even him.
It was all of the people he had let into his life. New friends and old alike. Foster parents he'd finally attempted to be kinder towards. And Vincent...who didn't deserve any of this.
When he met the other teen's gaze, Kurama leaned back against the counter and frowned. This was it...]
I'm sorry.
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all of that effort, allowing himself to act on his concern for once despite how transparent it would make him...he may as well have been smashing his head against a brick wall. and Kit - Kurama - both of them had allowed him to continue his fruitless quest, knowing full well that it could only end in failure.
what had he expected? that because they'd fought without restraint once that his opinion might mean something? that admitting his feelings towards the other boy would be worth more than a few days of impatient waiting?
stupid. idiot. and there was no one to blame but himself. Vincent should have known better than to believe he could truly carve out a place in anyone's life, let alone someone as selfish as Kit had been. in the end he was as noteworthy as the furniture populating this dorm.
the table shakes when he rises, chair crashing into it hard enough that it nearly topples over from the force. he holds Kurama's gaze for a long moment, something indescribable burning white hot in his eyes.]
...of course you would.
[and that was it. in one devastating moment Vincent had realized that it wasn't even worth the effort to swing at him - what satisfaction could a brawl bring him? nothing would change. he'd already seen how hollow those feelings were.
he turns on his heel sharply and stalks towards his own bedroom. just looking at the other boy now made the bile rise up in his throat; he couldn't maintain eye contact without gagging. what he needed now was that shower, before he broke something.]
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He deserved them, though. Much as they hurt, carving out a place within him like a breath filled with razor blades, they were the consequence of his actions and his complete disregard for anyone but himself.
The manhandled furniture clattering around didn't so much as produce a jump from Kurama, but that white-hot stare nearly made him avert his eyes. It was almost too much to bear knowing what he had done to Vincent, and that not only was there nothing he could say to make it better, but that if the other teen did wind up leaving, he would have given him a safe place to stay and emotional support only to wrench it all away.
It was a fortunate thing he didn't have to look at himself. Probably, he'd feel the same need to gag if he did.
Nevertheless, he said nothing as Vincent stormed away. He didn't have a right, not when the other teen needed time to himself to process and decide what he wanted to do. Kurama needed to respect that. He especially needed to respect that as he hadn't respected anything else. But after the other boy had left the room and he was tasked with finishing with the cleanup of the kitchen, he did decide something.
Vincent didn't have another home to go to. Kurama would propose that if it came down to anyone leaving at all...the one to go should be him.]
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as soon as the door slams closed behind him he's storming through his room, hurling everything remotely stable in sight as he practically rips his clothes off. the bathroom fares no better, suffering from his poorly-conceived hurt even as the water turns on. the entire place looks like a tornado ran right through it - and with how little he cares about anything right now, Kurama may have even heard it.
none of it helps vent the emotions hurtling around inside his chest. halfway through the shower he finds them bubbling up painfully once more, and this time he turns his anger onto himself. without pause he begins slamming his fist against the tiled wall until the skins gives way to scarlet streaks.
the pain was as much a welcome distraction as it was a reminder that he'd already done the same to his insides. fool.
when he emerges once more into the shared living space, his hand has been properly bandaged and his guitar case slung across his back. he's dressed the same as ever, but there's a definite dampness to his hair. it seems that Vincent hadn't possessed enough patience to do any more than towel dry it.
he wants nothing more than to simply go, be he knows that Kurama won't let him leave without some form of conversation. it's why he pauses in his doorway, hand shoved in his pockets as his eyes roam in search of the other boy. there was nothing he wanted to do less than this, but once again he'd been left with no choice.]
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That thought carried him quickly through the tidying up of the kitchen and, after a quick trip to his own bedroom to collect his book bag and a couple changes of clothes, he went to sit and wait on the living room sofa. As fate would have it, he wasn't made to wait long before Vincent emerged from his room.
Predictably, he was carrying his guitar.
And his hair was dripping wet like another time he'd emerged from that same bedroom.
When Vincent's heated gaze landed on him, Kurama rose off the sofa and, hoisting his bag over one shoulder, tossed a set of keys toward the other boy.]
I figured you might try and leave, and if that is what you want to do, I won't stop you. But...you shouldn't have to be the one who goes. It should be me.
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he wants to hurl them right back in Kurama's face, but manages to at least contain that. instead he cants his head to the side, spinning the keys painfully around his finger. just another brilliant idea in a long line of them.]
Don't be so full of yourself. I have practice.
[it was the truth, albeit only half of it. Vincent did indeed have practice today, something that had been scheduled for quite some time. but what he wasn't saying was that he didn't intend to return after they'd finished playing.
it meant abandoning all of his belongings not on his person to Kurama's discretion, but that was a sacrifice he was willing to make. anything to get away from this and to keep this pompous asshole from martyring himself over Vincent's pain.]
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[Precious little escaped Kurama's notice, even with being sleep deprived and on the verge of collapse. Both Vincent's twinge of pain and blatant refusal to back down from any such inconvenience were noted, but neither one was commented upon. Much as Kurama cared about his would-be partner's well-being, that was obviously the last thing Vincent wanted to hear from him right now. And forcing the issue would only encourage the other boy to be more reckless with himself, not more careful.
He didn't believe for a moment that Vincent had to leave for practice, however. Not now. Later, perhaps, but he'd been in no real hurry to go anywhere until Kurama had decided to be the bearer of bad news himself. But that was one more thing in a long line of those Kurama was not about to call the other boy out on. He would keep his word. If Vincent wanted to go, then he wouldn't stop him.
But he wouldn't pretend to like the idea, either.
His stare was unfaltering as he circled the arm chair and came to stand nearer the other teen. Even as he held his hand out to accept the keys back from Vincent, if indeed he wished to relinquish them, Kurama didn't look away. He expected violence. He expected blistering hot rage. But these were things that he was built to handle, even in this body. It seemed Kit's form remembered everything and, while it was significantly more human, it was just as enduring. He would take whatever Vincent wanted to dish out.
He would even fight back to give him the release he was too bullheaded to realize he needed.
But only if Vincent instigated anything.]
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but the epiphany that had been forced upon him earlier still lingers with Vincent now. as he stares deep into this once-familiar emerald eyes, he knows that lashing out now would only serve to make himself more sick. it would be affirming the mockery that all their previous fights had truly been, making an emotional fool out of himself for no gain whatsoever. violence now would only be as hollow as the rest of their relationship had been.
it seems that Kit had stolen even this from him with his actions. how fitting.
no matter what he did now, he knew that Kurama would use it as fuel to further his consequenceless guilt. his former self had the same habit, and he could tell by the set of the other boy's jaw that it was an inherited trait. whatever he did or said, his former companion would sit and allow it to eat away at himself without ever acting on it, as if feeling bad were enough to justify his actions. it wouldn't change anything. he'd continue doing as he pleased all the same.
that loathsome thought is almost enough to prompt him to relinquish the keys, but at the last second they swung up to be encircled by his fist, hand hovering a few inches from Kurama's outstretched own. he could justify it by saying he wanted to be able to send his bandmates to retrieve his things sometime in the future, but Vincent knew better. what he wanted was a memento, a constant reminder of the costliest mistake he'd ever made.
they stand in silence for a long moment before he finally speaks up, his words low and burning.]
He deserved to believe in something better than you.
[not Kit. Kit had gotten exactly what he'd wanted out of all of this. the person that he was speaking of was none other than Hiei, the boy in his visions and this thing's partner in another life.
sympathy had never really crossed his thoughts throughout all of the memories he'd experienced, no matter how visceral they'd been. but looking at the only thing that, to Vincent's knowledge, the demon had ever cherished and trusted, he can't help but feel it welling up inside him.
Hiei possessed nothing. no past, no affection, no future. his life had been bleak from beginning to end, with a single bright spot in all of that futility - Kurama. even someone as bloodthirsty and vicious didn't deserve that. the least the world could have done was provide him with something truly worth believing in.]
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Vincent was angry at the wrong person.
Kit's impetuousness, which exceeded even his own, was to blame for the disaster that had befallen them. Had the choice been his, Kurama wouldn't have wanted this. He would never have chosen himself over anyone who had given so much of themselves to him. Why hadn't Kit been able to see that? Even without having experienced the crushing weight of the Gateway of Betrayal, he had still witnessed the memory of Shiori and of Yusuke's sacrifice on her behalf. He had seen how effective his partnership with Hiei was because of how deeply they trusted one another. He had to know that Kurama cherished the people around him from the very depths of his heart and yet...he'd not only been inclined to shed the bonds he'd forged, but he'd been eager to do so, too.
And all of it was to become someone he only thought he understood.
He was such a fool...and now an inescapable part of Kurama. But unlike his other self, Kurama would not run from what he was, whether he liked what was there or not. Neither would he attempt to shirk his responsibilities. Even if the decision wasn't one that he had made, Kit could no longer answer for his mistakes the same way that the youko he'd been when he was younger could no longer answer for the horrible acts he'd committed. As such, that task fell to the person Kurama was now. Some strange and altogether frightening amalgamation of the youko Kurama, Shuichi Minamino, and Kit Florentine.]
I know.
[Vincent was right. Hiei deserved better. He had always deserved better than the lot in life he'd been given, if it could be said he was given anything at all but a cursed existence.
That was why...Kurama didn't want to cast him out, to rob him of another place to call home. He could be safe here, protected in the dorms. He wouldn't be as likely to be a target if Kurama wasn't there drawing unwanted attention.]
I'm going to my parents'.
[He was not going there at all, unwilling to put them in the same kind of danger his presence might be throwing at Vincent. But the other teen didn't need to know that. All that mattered was that he had a place to go...if he wanted it.
And if he didn't...it was at least a place they shared where they could meet up in a week's time.]
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Do whatever you want. It's not my problem.
[had it ever been his problem? he supposed not. yet another moment of abject stupidity.
in a moment of extreme spite, Vincent feels intensely glad that he'd be denying this person the partner he'd once worked alongside in their last life. Kurama may not have any interest in rectifying his mistakes, but the boy housing his companion certainly did. no one deserved to experience this relationship a second time over.
there's nothing left for him to say that won't send him teetering into a dangerously vulnerable state. once that wouldn't have bothered him, but now he understands that feeling of safety had always been an illusion. in order to protect whatever was left of his dignity he turns and begins heading for the door.
it had been nice to have a place he truly felt comfortable in for once. but everything had its end.]