COUNTDOWN: I SEE YOU

[cordibus]

Seven days remain.

The warning bells of the Nightly Curfew ring across the city. There's a faint hum from the phone this time before the icon appears. This time it displays a time: 1:00AM

The rest of the night is normal. Perhaps you've cuddled up with family, or you've gone to bed early to wait, but sure enough, time tick by right until 1 in the morning when....

You're back into that application again. A single question before you're even permitted to type anything else. And while it seems to be overwritten by something inside of you, it feels a lot more natural than before. Which is, truthfully...troubling.

But then something happens...

WƎ☹C!ERROR!OMƎ ▒ O ▒ HƎ FIN⟡☹ QUIZ!!ERROR!!ERROR!
⟡nƧwƎ!ERROR!r from ▒ hƎ hƎ⟡r▒ , ▒ hƎ p⟡r▒ of you ▒ !ERROR!h⟡▒ h⟡Ƨ bƎƎn dƎniƎd for f⟡r ▒ oo ☹ong.

Is your ☹ife here ⟡ ☹ie?
YƎƧ | DƎfini▒ Ǝ☹y | ƧurƎ | I'vƎ hd my !ERROR! doub▒ Ƨ bƎforƎ, bu▒ yƎƧ | HƎ☹☹ YƎƧ | ▒ hƎrƎ iƧ no o▒ hƎr conc☹uƧion | I wiƧh I cou☹d dƎny i▒ nd ☹ivƎ hƎrƎ pƎcƎfu☹☹y !ERROR!bu▒ i▒ 'Ƨ ▒ ruƎ.

▒ h⟡nk you...!ERROR!▒ h⟡▒ wi☹☹ bƎ ⟡☹☹. ☹Ǝ▒ uƧ ƧƎƎ wh⟡▒ your hƎ⟡r▒ b☹oo!ERROR!mƧ in▒ o...

I SEE YOU.

What had just happened? Before you can think about it for too much, and as your heart beats faster, the screen returns to normal, and another message flashes.

Well shit. Lets try this again. Answer from the heart, the part of you that has been denied for far too long. DO IT QUICKLY!

Is your life here a lie?
Yes.

Sorry lambs, this time we can't kid around...

Once you are done, you are tossed once more into the main chatroom. Is fear rising? Is your heart beating faster? There's a lot more at stake now it seems. Fortunately, your user names are the names that you wrote down in the last survey, but with all those questions it's....hard not to think of them as your own. Maybe you'll be cursing at this device, but it looks like you're already deep down the rabbit hole by now.

And now...something's might be looking right back.

[OOC: This is one of the final network post before Awakening. ALL Users will now be able to speak of who they are in their AU life without the information being blocked by the application.

Additionally, while speaking, Applenet might spazz out, like above. If this happens, a random painful memory will hit both Awakened and Unawakened (please warn if the visions are graphic for other players). They might find themselves writing down things afterwards regarding the memory (for example, getting shot, they might write down the pain they are felling, etc) and regretting it. This can happen up to 5 times per user.]

Comments

[touketsu]

[Putting other people before him? He's...he's not. That's not what he's doing at all! He just wouldn't be able to live with himself — or the way Michi would look at him — if he trampled over other people just to protect them. There were limits! Lines he couldn't cross.

But Gabe, or Guts, whoever he really is, won't hear any of it. As the bag is thrust at him, Kouyuki stumbles back a step and gawks down at it in his arms. Would this really allow him to better protect Michi and himself? Was it worth it to accept it, if it meant that this person would be without these items?

Does it even matter? It's not like saying no this time really seems to be an option, and so...reluctantly, his arms tighten around the bag and he nods.]

Fine...but when this is over, I'm going to give everything back. Because I won't need any of it to protect my brother. You'll see. I don't need handouts. I...can protect him with my own two hands.

[blackdogdown]

[There are no lines to Guts. But the line about handouts strikes home, so he nods a little. He understands but he doesn't care. ]

Don't feel guilty, its not like I'm selfless enough to give you anything I'd really need.

[He nods. ] I ain't protecting your brother for you anyway. You gotta do that shit yourself. I got my own problems.


But we do know eachother, and you're a kid. It'd be a pretty shitty adult to not at least give you a leg up.

[touketsu]

You're wrong.

[Kouyuki shakes his head, and with the gesture, dispels thoughts of retreat. He may be unnerved, but more than anything else, he's angry. All these assumptions being made about him, from the very start they'd gotten under his skin. People telling him he wouldn't understand things, that he wasn't ready, and calling him a kid.

He's tired of hearing it. Like any of them know who he is. Gabe should, but...]

We don't know each other. You're not who I thought you were at all.

[blackdogdown]

[He inclines his head and sighs.] Fair enough. Your pretty much right anyway.

[He considers. If he's going to leave, he doesn't have much to loose. He might as well explain things. ] Its Guts, not Gabe. Gabe ain't here anymore. Gabe woulda stayed and helped but he's pretty much dead. I'm not him, but I can't help but think a little like him sometimes and he liked you, even if I don't know you.

[He shrugs] Maybe it'll turn out you aren't the person you think you are either. I dunno, I haven't talked to many people about this. It doesn't really matter though, does it. You're gonna stay and protect your brother either way.

[touketsu]

[Those words are a trigger.

Gabe woulda stayed and helped but he's pretty much dead. Pretty much dead. Pretty much...dead.

How can he just say that like it doesn't mean anything? How can he say it like it's not his fault?!

The bag and the umbrella both drop to the damp earth with a wet thump, a sound that's only muted by the angry scream that emanates from Kouyuki as he lunges forward. Fists clenched. Knuckles white. Both hands swinging for any part of the older man that he can reach.]

He'd still be here if it wasn't for you!!

[blackdogdown]

[He really, really, wasn't expecting that. The fact that people might have cared about the past life that felt fake to Guts took him by surprise. He barely has time to bring his arms up to block before Kouyuki comes swinging. He lets out an oof--and react on instinct, grabbing a fistful of hair and swinging him away.

He huffs before his brains turns off "I'm being attacked mode" and he realizes what he's done.
Part of him is horrified, but adrenaline still shoots through his veins, making a little hard to focus on things like morals. ]

Gabe wasn't real. He's just me without all the fucked up shit. Brainwashed by god knows what outta being everything I was. Its flattering you like him better, but he's as fake as everyone else here.

[touketsu]

[Kouyuki resists as thick fingers seize him by the hair. He punches and kicks, fists slamming into Guts' abdomen, feet flying violently against his shins and knees until, suddenly, he can't reach anymore. Finds himself being thrown out of arms reach. His own feet sliding in mud until they're out from underneath him and he's toppling over backwards into a puddle.

And he sits there a moment, chest rising and falling with angry breaths he can't quite catch, breaths on the verge of hyperventilating. Is he more hurt, more terrified, or more furious? He can't tell. He doesn't know. All that makes sense to him is everything Guts is telling him isn't real.]

They're not fake...

[Hands trembling, he pushes himself back up to his feet. It'd be best to stay down, probably. But he's always been tenacious. Especially when he's fighting for other people. And for his brother.

Nothing that hurt that much could really be a lie.]

Gabe was real! He was my friend! You're the one who's fake!

[blackdogdown]

They are! [He hasn't lost his temper this bad since...well since Luci. Maybe even before that. ]

Everyone in your perfect sickening little life is as fake as he was! You're probably fake! Its all fake, fake fake down the core of this sick rotting world! It makes me want to puke. I shouldn't be here, Gabe never should have been here. I had a life somewhere else and I thought Gabes was maybe good enough a replacement but I was wrong

[touketsu]

[Every time Guts repeats that word Kouyuki feels like he's been struck. Every time it is a reminder of the visions he's had and, worse still, of the meaning behind his very own name.

Artificial snow.

He's told himself again and again that it's a coincidence. For fourteen years he's lived with and loved his name. He'd never had any reason to doubt it or dislike it. Not until Luci appeared, and the app along with them.]

Shut up...

[He cradles his head in his hands, rain water dripping down his face.]

Shut up, shut up, shut up...!!

this tag was a mistake

[blackdogdown]

[He opens his mouth to say something, but for once, a bit of wiggling guilt in his mind compels him to listen. Guts shuts up.

Kouyuki, if thats who he even really is, its so disorienting it is, looking at someone who he's known for years but is a stranger. Someone who is about to realize what Gabe did in one horrible instant and theres nothing either of them can do to stop it.

No....better it be now. Not then, when he will be needed. If Guts was weaker, his breakdown would have cost him his life. ]

Its unavoidable. [Finally, he speaks, and his voice while angry, is tight and controlled. ] The you that is standing in front of me will be dead in a few days. Make your peace with it. Deny it. I can't control what you do.

everything hurts

[touketsu]

[No... It's a lie. It has to be. If anything happens to him, who will look out for Michi? In all of what Guts has said, that is by far the most pressing issue. He's not eager to sacrifice his own life or anything like that, he wants to live, but if it were to ever come down to it, as the older brother, he has a responsibility to protect Michi at any cost. He can't die before he can be certain no harm will befall his little brother. He can't disappear.

Shakily, Kouyuki takes one step forward. And then another. But it isn't Guts he makes his way towards this time, but the bag and umbrella he'd dropped on the ground earlier. He'll take the things offered to him. And he'll use them despite saying he wouldn't. He'll use them to spite Guts for doubting him. He'll use them to make sure nothing bad happens to his family. And he'll use them to make sure no one else is lost the way Gabe was.]

I...I'm going home.

[But before he takes a step away from the tree and Guts, before he can turn his back on the man and all his lies, he has one last thing to say. Though he doesn't dare meet Guts' gaze this time when he says it, instead staring at the ground as if he'd like nothing more than to let his feet pound the earth and carry him far, far away from this moment.]

I'm not going to accept that I'll die just because you say I will. Because I've got something worth living for. And Gabe...I have to believe that he did too. And that maybe a part of him is still alive...because you're fighting to protect what he cared about most. Right? If that was all fake, you wouldn't bother...

[blackdogdown]

[Guts doesn't go to comfort Kouyuki in the freezing rain. He stands a little ways off, staring down at his feet. Kouyuki starts to walk away, and he makes no move to follow. ]

....

[He doesn't have anything to say. He can't promise Kouyuki will lose anything, or keep anything. All he knows is what he experienced. ]

Good luck then. Probably don't mean much from me...but hope you and Michi get out alright.

[He doesn't say anything about what Gabe felt. Maybe he doesn't know. ]

[touketsu]

[Guts is right. It doesn't mean much coming from him. But it means something coming from the man who used to be Gabe...more than Kouyuki cares to admit, even to himself.

He isn't ready to let go. He isn't ready to accept what this means.]

Don't worry about us. We're not your responsibility.

[Finally, Kouyuki turns and starts away. The sooner he gets home, the sooner he can pretend this never happened. That is...if he can sneak in the front door without anyone asking questions. Why is he drenched to the bone? Why is he covered with mud? Why is his hair disheveled and his eyes red? And what's in the bag...?

He might need Michi's help, a fact which plants a seed of guilt so deep he fears he'll never be rid of it. He's supposed to be protecting his little brother, not inadvertently dragging him into this mess.]